Five Wedding Etiquette Tips

When do you ask people to be attendants?

 You should ask within a month of the engagement announcement, ideally, but realistically, it’s best to wait until you know how many guests there will be. If you’re only going to have 50 guests, then six or more bridesmaids is going to look silly. Do, however, ask everyone at the same time (give or take a day or so), to avoid anyone feeling left out.

Can I ask bridesmaids to alter their look?

These people are your friends, so you know what they look like and what their styles are. You can’t ask them to cut or colour their hair, laser off a tattoo, get a fake tan or delay plans to have a baby. Your friends will want to look their best for you, but don’t make them feel uncomfortable in any way. The important thing is that they’re standing with you, not how much they weigh, or whether they have pale skin.

Should the bride pay for her bridesmaids’ wedding-day hair and makeup?

If you’re determined that your bridesmaids should all have professional hair and beauty treatments, then it should be on your dime. Being a bridesmaid is an expensive affair and if they’re already paying for a dress, a hen party, and their accommodation, then spending a further $200 on make-up and hair simply isn’t fair. Pay for the pampering yourself and think of it as your gift to them.

My fiancé is equally close to his two best friends, so who should be his best man?

It’s unusual, but not unheard of, for a groom to choose two best men! It can actually work out quite well, as there’s two people to share the duties and they can also work out a comedy routine for the speech!

What are the minimum and maximum ages for ring bearers and flower girls?

Ideally, the age range for ring bearers and flower girls is from four to eight years old. If the children are younger than four years old, you can’t really rely on them to walk down the aisle without help, and children older than eight often think it’s all a bit babyish and might end up looking sulky and self-conscious.

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